JEFF PEARLMAN

Coming October 2022: "The Last Folk Hero: The Life and Myth of Bo Jackson"

five best baseball stadiums …

Just got back from Fenway. Man, what a stadium. I’m a New York boy at heart, but Fenway is sooooo much better than Yankee Stadium or (hahahaha) Shea. There’s just something about the texture to the place—genuine, authentic, oozing with passion. I was sort of instructed long ago to hate the Sox, but it’s kind of hard when you’re there, smelling the smells and feeling the feels. Just a joy.

Anyhow, I’ve decided to give you my five best baseball stadiums in America. In order …

1. Fenway Park—Easily. Yeah, the seats are at odd angles, and the bathrooms are nasty. But the charm conquers all.

2. Wrigley Field—See Fenway.

3. Dodger Stadium—The fans are pretty lame (show up late, leave early), but the stadium is wonderful.

4. Minute Maid Park—I know … I know—the joint is as traditional as a Justin Timberlake single. But there’s something about it that just works. Plus, most important, the press box buffet is first rate.

5. Safeco Field—Still manages to blow me away. Magnificent.

By the way, I’ve invented a word, and I’d like to debut it here. It’s Constaria. This is when you really have to go to the bathroom, and it feels like you’ve got the runs, but when you finally reach the toilet nothing comes out. The term is used regularly in my house to describe a condition nobody wants to endure. Feel free to bring it into your home, too.

Final thought: Why does my nose look so weird in this photo? Hmm …