Brought my daughter Casey to school today. She’s starting first grade. I am very afraid, because they have televisions in the school! Televisions that can shoot socialistic gamma rays into her brain! I hear the televisions were created by communist scientists in Kenya! I hear they want to turn my daughter into a Kenyan communist! Today I have been told our communist socialistic dictator Obevila spoke to our childrenâ€”my childrenâ€”and told them to kill The Man.
I am scared.
Damn gamma rays!