The real truth behind athletes

Throughout my years covering sports, many a fan has said something along the lines of, “Man, do I wish I had your job!” or “Wow! So what’s it like in the clubhouse!”

I try and explain. Not as exciting as you’d think. These guys don’t walk on water. Sorta crass. Etc. But nobody ever seems to believe me. They hear the classical music accompanying the pre-game World Series intros and get caught up in the splendor of it all.

At first base—dun, dun, dun!—Ryan—dun! dun! dun!—Howard!

Pass the tissue.

Finally, I have the material to open eyes. My friend Rob Massimi forwarded me the below video, which perfectly—perfectly—illustrates what I’ve been telling people for years.

Please, I beg of you, watch …

5 thoughts on “The real truth behind athletes”

  1. I have watched this video over 100 times in the last year or so, and me and my friends have quoted it probably 3,000 times.

    It is, quite simply, the best video on the Internet.

  2. The guy he was telling the story to wasn’t grossed out, but he was trying to get away from George. Not for nothing, he was very descriptive and I’ll award him points for that. Mmmm, crabs.

  3. Wow. Just…wow. If this ever happened to me, I would never, ever, ever, ever, ever tell anyone and I would pay the dude that helped me as much as I could afford to pretend it never happened.

  4. Kevin Van Valkenburg

    Jeff, I hope you’ve seen the autotuned version, but if you never have, I’m happy to be the one to pass it along.

    I don’t think it’s hyperbole to call it one of the greatest You Tube videos ever. Enjoy.

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