JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

I hate …

reaney (18)

… Joe Lieberman, watered-down pasta sauce, fantasy football, college coaches, cats and Burger King.

But I loathe winter.

It’s already started. I’m sitting here in Cosi, freezing my ass off. Absolutely freezing. Door opens, chill blasts through, I’m miserable. I hate the cracking skin on my hands. I hate the excessive heating bills that haunt my dreams. I hate when snow creeps in between the bottom of my glove and the top of my sleeve. I hate walking my dog at 7 am. I hate shoveling my driveway, hate chopping ice, hate that stretch from January 3 through mid-April, when hell comes to New York and grips us all by the throat.

If tomorrow my wife says, “Let’s move to San Diego!”—I’m gone.

Sadly, she likes the cold.

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