JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

“all-shitheel” interview team

todd-pratt

I don’t actually know what a “shitheel” is. But one of my loyal blog readers wanted my “all-shitheel interview team.” What readers want, I supply …

C-Todd Pratt: The most arrogant steroid-taking .251 hitter a guy could meet.

1B-Will Clark: Simply put, a dick.

2B-Bret Boone: Could actually be an OK interview. But once he gained 40 pounds of muscle in six weeks, I lost interest.

SS-Tony Womack: Can also be a jerk at second. Rude and arrogant, with occasional breaks for indifference.

3B-Alex Rodriguez: Never actually bad to me, but completely, utterly, remarkably full of crap and inauthentic.

OF-Jim Edmonds: I actually had some nice times with Jim, but, man, is he a cocky SOB. Especially in his heyday.

OF-Jayson Werth: I will never understand punks like this. You possess such a marginal skill—why be cocky about it? Why?

OF-Marlon Byrd: Not good enough to speak to people as he often does.

DH-Albert Belle: Back in the day, put the wad in dickwad. A truly troubled and tortured man.

P-John Rocker: No shocker.

P-Arthur Rhodes: Inexplicably rude to reporters who try and sit in his chair.

P-Kerry Wood: Has probably changed, but a pretty big punk as a kid.

P-Mark Prior: His career is exhibit 1A why it never pays to be arrogant. Because the fall is hard.

P-Roger Clemens: Just because.

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