OK, bad things are about to happen. The Packers will probably beat the Jets. The Giants will sweep the Rangers, rendering the World Series utterly worthless. Sharron Angle will win* and Sarah Palin will give some lengthy address to the morons who love her.
Not all is lost.
Just a few moments ago I received the following e-mail:
message: dear paula your very bueatyfull
Granted, my name isn’t Paula. But it’s possible someone thinks I’m Paula and very beautiful. Which is true, I am very beautiful. Especially for a 38-year-old writer with hairy shoulders and thick, bulging veins polluting both legs. And if someone wants to call me Paula, well, I’m fine with that.
* As my friend Mike Lewis wisely noted to me recently, we Dems are probably better off with Harry Reid losing, as long as it doesn’t turn the Senate over to the GOP. Why? A. Because Reid sucks. Like, truly sucks. And were he running against a sane Republican, I’d likely vote for that person. But Angle ain’t sane—she’s crazy. Not crazy like a fox. Just crazy. B. If Reid loses, the new leader will likely either be New York’s Chuck Schumer or Illinois’ Dick Durbin. Either guy would be an enormous upgrade.
** What the fuck is that line going down my head?
*** In honor of Saturday, here’s a video of the 1990 Mahopac High School baseball team losing to someone. Brilliant analysis provided by Jeff Pearlman and P.J. Molinari.