JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

Fists over guns.

Am watching CNN’s report of a college kid who was shot and killed at a frat party.

Which leads me to ask this: What ever became of fists?

Remember fists? You can use them to punch people. In the guts. In the nuts. In the jaw. Fists can hurt, especially when they’re large and raw and coating thick or sharp bones. They can knock a person out and cause severe bleeding. When I was in junior high school a kid punched me in the head. When I was in elementary school I punched Dieter von Ahn in the head (Sorry, Dieter. I owe you an apology). Fists serve as a remarkably impactful conveyor of messages. Seriously, they work.

Best of all, fists almost never kill. Maybe Boom Boom Mancini would argue the point, but, generally speaking, a couple of jabs to the head only hurt. And the recovery time is quick.

Guns, on the other hand, end lives. Which is terrible in and of itself, but also terrible when it comes to making a point. You’re mad that ol’ Biff Smith stole your girlfriend? Punch him, don’t shoot him. A punch will leave a lasting impression. A gunshot to the stomach will end his life. No impression. Just dead.

So take it from me, a guy who’s been punched a whole lot.

Fists—good.

Guns—bad.