Earlier this year the students in my Manhattanville College journalism class were asked to write a short essay about their favorite food. Some picked pasta, others ice cream, others mama’s homemade whatever.
Bashir Masani picked Taco Bell’s Cheesy Gordita Crunch.
Bashir’s a pretty quiet student. Extremely nice guy, dry sense of humor, great to have around. His essay, which follows, made me laugh from beginning to end. And, as I told him yesterday, I’ll never eat the damn thing …
There is just something about Taco Bell’s Cheesy Gordita Crunch that keeps me coming back for more.
To frequent eaters of this food, the Cheesy Gordita Crunch is referred to as a “Cheesy Gord.” The simplistic idea of the “Cheesy Gord” is absolutely genius. The Cheesy Gordita Crunch is a hard taco, whose exterior is surrounded by melted Mexican cheese that helps to attach a large soft taco shell. The basic body plan of the “Cheesy Gord” is a large soft taco shell that contains a hard taco inside. However, that is just the beginning of the Cheesy Gordita Crunch. Inside the hard taco shell is the standard Taco Bell ground beef, lettuce, cheese, and best of all, the special “Cheesy Gord” sauce. This sauce, which is referred to as “Gord Sauce” by eaters, is a complete mystery. Very few know what it’s real name is, or know what it is made up of. It is a white sauce that just makes the Cheesy Gordita Crunch. The sauce gives it the taste you expect every time you have a “Cheesy Gord,” and it never lets you down.
Once you get your Cheesy Gordita Crunch, it is popular to sprinkle on some of Taco Bell’s Fire sauce. For me, the Cheesy Gordita Crunch is my favorite food because not only does it make my eyes light up, but from the first bite on, it feels like heaven.