JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

Just so you know …

This is classic, especially coming on the heels of the Spencer Haywood toilet episode.

So, as I write this I’m sitting in a (irritatingly noisy) Starbucks alongside the Staples Center. As one of those REALLY FRIGGIN’ LOUD promotional events, Delta Airlines set up a bunch of hoops, and is hosting a free throw contest. If one sinks four of five, he/she snags tickets to tonight’s Thunder-Lakers game.

I don’t need the tickets (press pass), but I thought it’d make a cool blog post to try. Hence, I waited on a 10-minute line, alongside a construction worker just off the job and a kid in a Bulls jersey. I finally made my way to the front, signed a waiver and stepped up to the line. “Good luck!” the perky blonde in the Lakers shirt said.

I missed the first, sank the second, sank the third, missed the fourth, passed on the fifth. As I walked away, the perky blonde handed me a Lakers pin. I gave it to the kid in the Bulls jersey, who quickly handed it to someone else. I turned to leave, and the perky blonde said, “Jeff?”

I swiveled my head. “Yeah?” I said.

Was she about to compliment my shooting form?

Gave me another five shots?

Slide me into the finals?

Ask me out?

“Just so you know, your fly is wide open.”