Chicken on the La Quinta Inn floor

So a couple of minutes ago I found myself sitting on the bathroom floor of room 341 in a La Quinta Inn, eating chicken from a Styrofoam container. Hell, here’s the proof …

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In case you’re wondering, there’s no glory in eating chicken from a Styrofoam container on the floor of room 341 of the La Quinta Inn. None at all. If you think—really, really, really think—of what’s gone on in this room, well … blfldlsdlasdjasd. I’ll be blunt: I’m sure, in the hotel’s 20 years, 341 has been a place for male hookers, female hookers, transvestite hookers; an average of 14.3 masterbatory acts per week; boogers wiped on the desk, on the carpet; infant drool; dog drool; little nuggets of shit falling from diapers. On and on and on. There’s a reason my folks always, without fail, wrap hotel room remote controls in plastic Glad bags. Namely, because these rooms are germ spas.

However, hunger is hunger, chicken is chicken and my kids are asleep in the main room. Hence, there I sat, eating … in the bathroom.

On the floor.

Ew.

3 thoughts on “Chicken on the La Quinta Inn floor”

  1. Jeff, I applaud your honesty. Not many men would admit to eating , a most likely sub-par chicken dinner out of styro, let alone in a bathroom that has seen more traffic than a porn set in the valley. I have done some unspeakable things in cheap hotels, but never anything like eating dinner in the bathroom. Granted many a road dinner has seen the bathroom of a cheap hotel, but never going in……

  2. Having been a road warrior for 25 years I know these rooms all have a table and/or at least a desk.
    I got tired of eating out and often brought the food back to the room to eat in front of the TV.
    Eventually I carried my own Microwave, motels rarely had them at the time. I would usually have leftovers from home the first night and would hit the store for the frozen meals other nights.
    Quicker than ordering or finding someplace you felt like eating at.
    My first Microwave baked, broiled, and toasted also.
    One Thanksgiving in Polson, Montana I was too far away to come home so I baked a Game Hen, and nuked a Yam and Veggies in a tiny mom and pop motel. Missed the family but it was a great dinner out of that hybrid microwave.
    I’ve done the motel thing, no way you need to eat in the bathroom.

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