Congrats. You’ve ended the lives of 298 people who had nothing to do with your stupid cause.


Congrats to the pro-Russia separatists. You killed lots of people who did nothing to you. Have a cookie.

I would like to use this blog entry to congratulate the pro-Russia separatists who accidentally killed 298 people yesterday.


You did it. Single-handedly, you did it. By (oops) accidentally firing a n SA-series missile at a passenger jet, as opposed to a military aircraft, you ended the lives of adults and children who had nothing to do with your cause. As the New York Times wrote today: “There were strong indications that those responsible may have errantly downed what they had thought was a military aircraft only to discover, to their shock, that they had struck a civilian airliner.”


I’m aware there’s a 99.9999999999 percent chance someone involved with this act is not reading this morning—but on the rarest of rare chance you are: Go fuck yourself.

Let me say that again: Go fucking fuck yourself. Or, here’s a better idea: Next time you want to make a point in your murderous efforts to take a stand, tie yourself to a rock in the middle of the jungle and light yourself on fire. Or stab yourself with a kitchen knife. Cover yourself in cheese and unleash 101 rats. Have unprotected sex with the world’s most infected STD carriers. Jump off a building. Drown yourself. Hell, do so while waving a flag. Write a suicide note. A really angry one.

Anything … but this.

I’m so tired of this shit—from mass shootings here in America to the this-will-never-ever-ever-ever-ever-be-resolved Israeli-Palestinian conflict to terrorism home and abroad. In case this hasn’t entered your minds, you’re ending lives. Like, forever. The children on that plane? They’ll never exist again. No families. No weddings. No highs. No lows. No nothing. You have, literally, extinguished their existences—to make a political point. Really, good work on that one. Good work.

How about, in the name of Hosken Powell, everyone stop making deathly statements at the expense of innocents? How about the lot of you agree to meet in a Grand Canyon-sized boxing ring? We’ll get Michael Buffer and a bunch of Uzis. It’ll be fun.

Just stop the madness.

Life is too short.

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