Dear GOP

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Dear GOP:

It’s me—Jeff Pearlman. Hello.

So I’m not really one of your people, but I’m writing with a favor: Please end this.

By this, I mean the presidency of Donald Trump. Please. Pretty please. Did you watch the press conference earlier today? Seriously, did you experience that diarrhea show of an exercise? Is it still not clear to you the president of the United States — and I’m not being overly dramatic — is b-a-t-s-h-i-t l-o-c-o? Do you really not see this? Smell this? Hear this? Because it’s beyond obvious, and it’s beyond painful.

But this isn’t about pain — it’s about safety. Our safety. The United States is an increasingly vulnerable nation trying to keep its head above water during a tumultuous time in world history. I know you’re aware of this. ISIS looms. Al Qaeda looms. Russia looms (really, it looms). North Korea is launching shit. Israel sees America as its new enabler to do whatever the hell it wants. On and on. And you, Party of Lincoln and Reagan, have brought us this ogre. Again, I know you see what I see. I know it. Trump’s bluster is dangerous, as is his lack of interest in details, in nuance. He brought us Steve Bannon—freak show. He brought us Steven Miller—even bigger freak show. He lies and lies and lies and lies and lies and insults and insults and insults and Tweets and Tweets and Tweets.

And yet … you guys do nothing. You sit there, cowering in the corner, desperate to close your eyes and hope this thing somehow works itself out. He gave you the Supreme Court justice you wanted, as well as the Muslim, eh, seven-nation ban you wanted. So you were placated. But you were placated by the wrong man. This “president” is not a Republican. Really, he’s not even an American, in the “I live and die for this country” sense of the word. No, he’s a greedy, narcissistic, incurious, self-absorbed crazy person; a street-corner huckster who was presented the White House. There is nothing—absolutely nothing—in his history that suggests empathy, understanding, a concern for the working man and woman. His past, truly, is prologue. What he is doing now is what he did to the USFL, to Atlantic City, to Scotland, to Trump University students, to blacks who wanted to live in his Queens apartments. He promises big things, he guarantees big things, he rips those who see through the fake words, he accomplishes his goals—and then everything falls to shit.

Look, I know you don’t want to impeach. But, please, impeach. Mike Pence shares your ideals and your beliefs. He’ll fight to overturn Roe v. Wade, fight to overturn environmental protections. He believes Jesus is king and Planned Parenthood is Satan.

He is not a man I want as president.

But I will take him, with an enormous smile, over the sinister dishrag America finds itself holding.

GOP, stop the madness. Because, if you don’t, you’re going down with the ship.

And it will be ugly.