Goddess Alexa

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So anyone who knows me knows I love using the Quaz to talk three primary topics:

  1. Journalism.
  2. Death.
  3. Sex

But not just sex, per se. Sex employment. Sex working. Sex philosophy. It started six years ago with Quaz No. 33, when Jenny DeMilo came to this space and not only spoke openly about her work, but became someone I now consider a good friend. So, here we are again, with my first sex worker in quite a while.

“Goddess Alexa” (as she refers to herself professionally), however, is no run-of-the-mill sex worker. She’s a professional Domme who, eh … um … sits on people. Their faces. With her butt.  It’s the quirkiest of quirky enterprises, made all the more unique by her worldliness, understanding of geo-politics and potential future as an electrical engineer.

Today, Alexa discusses a crumbling planet, refusing to shit in a jar for dough and finding a boyfriend who embraces the gig. One can follow Alexa on Twitter here and visit her website here.

Goddess Alexa, you are the 332nd Quaz.

JEFF PEARLMAN: You’re known as the “Face Sitting Queen,” which seems like a really, um, quirky thing to build a reputation upon. So why face sitting? How did that happen? “

GODDESS ALEXA: I’m damn good at it! I’m pretty petite but I’ve always had a nice and plumper-than-average booty. My butt has literally been recognized by strangers as I’ve walked off an elevator, walked by in a restaurant, and in videos without them seeing my face first. So being so petite, having the nice butt and coming off nonchalant because I do it so effortlessly, lol … I grew a fanbase pretty quickly of normal fans, producers and models alike. I’ve given tips and advice to men who wish to have their wives/girlfriends do it to them, producers to tell their models. People would just watch my videos, enjoy it, talk about it … and eventually I just started getting called the “Face Sitting Queen” and being introduced to other models and producers like, “This is Alexa, the Face Sitting Queen.”

J.P.: You don’t seem anxious to ruin people, publicly humiliate them. Doesn’t that go against some Internet sex credo?

G.A.: Well the truth is, I’m more into going with the flow of whatever I feel like at the time and most of the time, I just don’t need to do all of that. My style is more like effortlessly devious and sexy and I know it, so that confidence makes me even even sexier. That’s why people love my face-sitting and handjob videos so much, because I do them so effortlessly. However, I do taunt, torturously tease, ruin and humiliate my personal slaves, and that’s because they went through the process to be granted such attention from me. Yes, even when being humiliated and ruined, they must deserve that kind of attention from me.


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J.P.: You’re a college student with the ultimate goal of becoming an electrical engineer. And I wonder—do you at all worry this stuff might follow you? Your pictures are everywhere; videos of you sitting on faces. Do you worry about an employer one day seeing this, or your 5-year-old daughter seeing this?

G.A.: I don’t worry about that. I don’t ever want to bear children. I work great with kids, understand them and speak to them very well. I’m the eldest sibling to seven brothers and sisters, and I actually raised one of them myself so I know what it feels like to be a parent. I was a better parent to my youngest sister, who’s now 12, than the average American parent is to her own child. My 21-year-old brother and 22-year-old sister have no problem with what I do, they don’t find it bad. In fact they find it interesting and entertaining, and the only thing they have ever cared about is that I’m happy and safe from the crazies (because I’ve had stalkers before).

As for my engineering pursuit, If an employer has an issue with the (consensual, responsibly carried out) things I’ve done and do, when a person is so much more than their job, then I wouldn’t want to work with them. I’m not just a dominatrix, I’m an intelligent-compassionate-strong-tactical-kind-loving human being. Treating a person as anything but what they are as a whole is just nonsensical and they wouldn’t be good enough in my mind to work with. The world doesn’t have any more room for bigotry or prejudice, so I don’t even like to associate myself with people like that even if they can give me something I want.

The things on the Internet are always going to be there. Most people who know I’ve done porn and am still shooting as a dominatrix are usually fascinated with what I do. I’m an aspiring electrical engineer, yes. But not because I want to go get a job in the field. It’s to have the knowledge. I simply want the knowledge to know how things work, to build what I want to build and make it work. If I do decide to work with any companies, it will be to build things that help communities, save nature or animals. It would be for something stronger than monetary gain, so naysayers can kiss the ground I walk on.

J.P.: Why are men so pathetic? It’s a weird question, but it’s sorta haunting. There are 100,000 male-oriented strip clubs for every Chippendales thing. We go to hookers, we buy porn, on and on and on. What is it about us?

G.A.: You know, I’ve often wondered this same exact question myself! Neither philosophy nor science can answer this question with enough accuracy.

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J.P.: How does your family feel about this line of work? Do they know? Are they confused? Celebratory?

G.A.: My family members don’t mind it at all. I’ve never been one to follow the conventional way of living. I began modeling only a few weeks after I turned 18, because my mom got me into it. She went to modeling school when she was a teenager and thought it would be a good idea to get me into it since I lived in a tiny town and wanted to get the hell out.

At age 21 I got into the vanilla mainstream porn industry and my family wasn’t really a fan of it. They were worried for my safety because I was in Los Angeles so often … traveling, being around strangers so often. But they didn’t treat me different as a person. When I completely switched to fetish work instead of mainstream vanilla, though, they didn’t feel the same about it. I mean that in a good way. The only thing they cared about was my safety, but now they ask me questions with intrigue instead of fear—which is cool.

My siblings think, “Hey, you’re not doing anything wrong and you get to make your own schedule and be who you are. So go for it!” Normal civilian jobs come with such sucky things like assimilation, dressing the same and acting the same, unfair wages, unequal pay between the sexes. My family know that If I went for a normal job here in America, I would be unhappy and outraged and most likely end up protesting my own job. I’d totally work with a company/organization/business if they were ethical, just and equal.

J.P.: What’s your money story from domme work? Like, the batshit craziest/weirdest/most unique experience you’ve had.

G.A.: I’ve had some craziness, some nastiness and some weirdness. The nastiest is probably the scat fans. LOL. They known they’re nasty kinky pervs too. I had a fan who was so into me, my ass, my facesitting that he wanted to purchase a scat jar. Scat is literal crap. He wanted to pay me to ship him a whole jar filled with it! Plus, fly me and my boyfriend out to Hawaii for a week to see me once a day and eat whatever crap I expelled. He wanted to pay to feed me to my heart’s content to ensure he would get to eat plenty. I was a bit meh about it and didn’t want to do it for so many days so we didn’t go.

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J.P.: Your boyfriend and his penis star in many of your videos. Um, that’s a sentence I’ve never before written. So how did you meet? How did you explain this to him? And is he at all concerned about future ramifications?

G.A.: My boyfriend loves when we get asked this story. It’s like a movie. So when I got into the industry, I pressed upon my agent to get me shoots out of state. Within three months, I received a week’s worth of paid shoots in South Florida, which is where my boyfriend is from and my little brother and stepmom live. So I traveled from California to Florida and stayed in a hotel with some other new models I was going to shoot with. The first girl I was roomed with was my complete opposite—she was a loud obnoxious party girl who would bring guys over to the room, snort coke and try to throw parties even though we had very early call times. I did my shoots and the week was over I decided to stay in Florida.

About a month later I was with a different roommate. She didn’t do drugs and try to have parties in our room like my previous roomie, but she desired so much attention from me. I had been seeing this guy on weekends and hanging out with this girl I met one night while out dancing with this guy I was seeing, so my roomie was jealous. She kept trying to get me to not hang out with him and that girl; to choose her instead.

I started to hang out with him less and with my roomie more. One day she wanted to go shopping before going away for a trip so I went with her to the mall. While there I drifted off away from her into a cell phone store. I wanted a new phone. After a few minutes I was about to walk out when my roomie walked in and began talking to the employees in there. She knew them. Openly she introduced me to them as Alexa, “my friend who does porn.” I sooo rolled my eyes when she did that.

She introduced two of them to me—both guys—and she pointed to one of them and whispered, “We fucked. But, shhh, because he’s married.” Then someone asked about our job, and the other guy (who’s now my boyfriend) said a disk comment—”They lay on their backs all day. Haha.” I made it clear I wasn’t pleased and he apologized. Later he sent me a text, again apologizing. I responded a few days later, and from there we had a sort of texting emoji battle, to see who could send the best emoji text and he sent me a picture of a view from Twin Peaks in San Francisco.

About 1 1/2 months later the two of us went to the beach. We had a great time that day and went out for lunch a few times after, then a few dinner dates, and then one night he asked me to be his girlfriend. He knew I did porn but I told him I would stop. One night we were just laying down after eating some pastries and watching Archer, and I turned to him and said, “I’m going to stop doing porn. No more hardcore stuff.” He knew that even though I was in the industry and there’s a stereotype about women who do porn, I’m nothing like that stereotype. So instead of being controlling, insecure, weird or abusive, he was willing to learn, understand and trust me.

About a year later I was in the fetish world and have been in it since. As far as ramifications go, he’s along the lines that I am. We don’t enable bigotry or prejudice. An employer would be more wise to look past the content and see his vast resume, education, clean record and that the mouth he has on him could practically sell a house to a homeless person. He’s someone any employer should hire. Plus what he does is harmless to himself, me and anyone watching.  It’s like I said to his sister the first time she found out about what we do—”What a young man does with his penis and a consenting adult is none of your business. And making it your business is odd. You should get that checked out.”

J.P.: Do you at all worry about the third wall? What I mean is, away from this life you’re just this young student with cats and a vegetarian lifestyle. Your Amazon wishlist has a bunch of sexy stuff, but also flashlights, sunglasses, a camera lens. If people find out too much about who you are away from the façade, does it at all ruin the fantasy?”

G.A.: Nah, not at all. Just like any other specialist in the entertainment world, our fans only feel closer to us and get more into us when they find out personal things like that. My fans specifically are pretty aware of who I am in my personal life, being that I’ve mixed it with my professional life quite a bit. I have often spoken out about healthy eating, animal rights, women’s rights, rights in general. I’ve posted quite a few videos, gifs and photos of my cats; even talked about them with other Dommes publicly over twitter. Sometimes a cat photo gets as many favorites as a selfie of me!

I’m a mix of different strokes, and different folks like different strokes. Actually, almost every pro Domme I’ve ever met is similar to me. Most of us are more observant than boisterous, able to stand just as strong alone as we do among a group of beautiful friends, are pretty intelligent. We’ve mostly taken some form of dance at some point in our lives, like to relax in the sun with a mixed drink more than go to a club, and have a longstanding committed relationships and pets who we like to relax next to, especially after a day of making videos. Some are lifestyle Dommes only, they don’t perform in videos, some are video Dommes, some are even just Instadommes, like wannabe “femdommes” on twitter or instagram and then some are lifestyle and video Dommes together. Naturally, I’ve always been more dominant mentally and sexually in my demeanor with people. I’ve never felt that being dominant means being mean, hardened, dark or unfeeling.

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J.P.: Earlier today Donald Trump just unleashed another Twitter tirade. Random question, but what do you think about the president? How did this happen?

G.A.: Well, I know what I feel, and that is anxiety-worry-irritation-outrage. I constantly find myself thinking, faaaccckk!!!! Will any peace-loving, intelligent and patient aliens come to earth to help our species because the world has seriously messed up. Again. How did this happen? Well, science says that when people don’t get proper food, don’t grow up in a stable and safe home, don’t get treated with love and respect … that it is the mathematical formula for shitty people who are more of burdens on society than good.

Mix that with all of the various click bait articles to rile people up, unjust laws, lack of persecution of murderers and rapists, a society that on average knows more about the Kardashians than the crimes being done against us on a daily basis, over-consumerism and the ever growing greed of capitalism … well thats how this happened.

J.P.: According to your website, you once made $3,320 for flashing your bare ass for 30 seconds, 14 times. Um, what? Story, please?

G.A.: That was a fun time. I have a fan who is an ass addict, doesn’t really do much with his money and his wife has a flat ass. So he gets off on spending his cash on cam, in a private chatroom one on one being teased. So the game was, he tributes me the amount I say, before I get into my panties to begin the show. We talk for a bit and then I just twirl around, walk away slowly, walk back seductively, move my hips, whatever I feel like doing at the moment. He gets so turned on that he wants to see my bare ass only, up close to the camera. Well, to get them off, he has to also send a tribute and once he does, I take my panties off and flash him for 20-to-30 seconds, then walk or prance away to put on a new pair of panties and repeat the process over and over until he has no more money left to tribute, or until I don’t feel like doing it anymore. Within two hours I made that money. It was one of my best yet …

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• Rank in order (favorite to least): Diamond Rio, Family Feud,, DJ Khaled, Viggo Mortensen, surfing, Barry Sanders, Reno, vaginas, golden delicious apples: Golden delicious apples, surfing and vaginas are favorites. I don’t know the other names.

• Five reasons one should make Las Vegas his/her home: Don’t. Unless you’re awesome or I’ve already moved away. I don’t want the population to increase much.

Aaron Judge had a truly crazy power run. Do you see him as the next great Yankee slugger?: I dont know who that is, but if it’s baseball and he’s making those hits then why not?

• Ever thought you were about to die in a plane crash? If so, what do you recall?: I never have thought that but I have been scared of it.

• Three memories from your senior prom?: I never went to senior prom! My mother removed me from high school in my junior year to help her raise my baby sister (aka raise my sister for her). I left for San Francisco at age 17 and got my GED.

• I have a really awful canker sore on my bottom lip right now. What shoud I do about it?: I’m not sure. I’d probably Google that. Or YouTube it. There’s a video for everything on there.

• What are the three biggest keys to great sex?: 1. Being honest and real with yourself and your partner about what you like, don’t like and what you want—right away and up front; 2. Role playing! Makes for great foreplay; 3. Always make your partner feel wanted, not needed, at all times not just days/times you want sex

• One question you would ask Timbaland were he here right now?: I don’t know who that is. I think he’s a music artist, but I dont know what he looks like, is about or anything else. At that point I guess I would ask him if he would go get me some cupcakes or donuts

This is my all-time favorite song. Thoughts?: While the words “You’re like a bowl of bitter beans” is being said it has a tone of a song you could play while cruising up the road to a mountain.

• You just Tweeted, “If I put peoples heads on cows bodies about to be slaughtered—would you report my image?” Um, what?: I’ve been creating digital composite images in photoshop lately, and I want to make some satire but not waste my time so I thought it would be a good idea to check the mindset of my public before making it. Hundreds of millions of animals are abused, raped (aka forced breeding, twins, and artifical insemination), torured and murdered for human consumption, cosmetics, fur fashion, sport, zoos, euthanization, neglect and car accidents. All in the name of being “entitled” to have the “right” to do so (aka eating their flesh and wearing their skin, displaying their heads as trophies and straight abuse). Human beings already commit crimes and atrocities against each other and the land we live on, adding in the hundreds of millions of animals per year in the USA alone is just unnecessary and monstrous. I send supplies and cash donations to multiple charities each month, but If every person would just donate one dollar or send one item for supplies each month, great things would happen. For people to take action to fix things and make the world better, they need to know the things going on, but even more they need to see it. Human beings are very visual creatures, the average person won’t listen or pay attention when you’re telling them about a cause, but if they see it … if their emotions kick in, they feel it and when they feel it they remember it, when they remember it they think about it even when they didn’t mean to at the moment and when that happens, it makes way for them to start asking questions, make changes in their perspective. Then, when their perspective changes, they change and they make changes happen for the better.