JEFF PEARLMAN

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My eternal mistake

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Earlier today I flew from Los Angeles to Cincinnati.

My plan was to wear running shoes on the plane, then work out this evening upon arriving at my motel. However, I always forget to slip on sneakers upon leaving the house, and wind up at the airport in flip-flops.

Then I go through security check, and the above scene plays out.

It haunts me.

The floor at LAX felt just as it looks. Cold. Clamy. A bit sticky, like three-day-old gum affixed to a desk. As soon as I reached security, and knew I’d need to once again go sock-less, I grunted. I am not one to be grossed out, but this was just … really … really … really disgusting.

And now I’ve probably got foot rot.

Oy.

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PS: An odd side note. Flew Delta, sat along a nice young woman with a cute dog in a carrying case. She asked if I’d be OK with the pooch sitting on her lap. “No problem,” I said. Seriously, the canine was adorable and the size of three packs of Junior Mints. Alas, one of the flight attendants came and told her the dog had to be in the case—then stood over us, principal-like, making sure my row-mate did as told. It was cold and weird and a bit uncomfortable.

That said, the woman didn’t talk back or snarl. It turns out her name is Kristina Schulman—former contestant on the Bachelor and owner of more than 100,000 Twitter followers. She Tweeted out something about the experience—and I re-Tweeted it. A bad look for Delta.