EggBoy is my hero. And I’m not kidding. He’s my fucking hero, and were he here right now I’d present him with a cape and the key to my house.
In case this all means nothing to you, EggBoy is 17-year-old kid who, yesterday afternoon, walked up behind the awful bigot, Australian senator Fraser Anning, and smashed a raw egg atop his skull. Now, I’m not a proponent of violence. Truly, I’m not. But if ever a statement needed to be made, it was at this moment, when Anning was standing there—in the wake of unspeakable tragedy—spewing Nazi-like propaganda. Fuck, Anning literally blamed the murder of 49 Muslims … on Muslims, and Tweeted DOES ANYONE STILL DISPUTE THE LINK BETWEEN MUSLIM IMMIGRATION AND VIOLENCE? He later added, “The real cause of the bloodshed on New Zealand streets today is the immigration program which allowed Muslim fanatics to migrate to New Zealand in the first place.”
So when this happened …
… well, the sound of egg smashing atop that asshole’s head brought me nothing but bliss.
One more point: Courage doesn’t come cheap, but false courage does. See, false courage is daring someone to take your gun. It’s false, because you have a gun. One that shoots bullets. So challenging me to take it from you, well, it’s hardly a challenge. Same goes for Donald Trump talking tough about how manly he is. Yeah, you’re manly surrounded by Secret Service agents at a rally attended by 5,000 of your wackiest backers.
Real courage, though, is doing something where, ultimately, you know you’ll likely get pummeled. But you walk forward anyhow, because the cause is righteous. So there was EggBoy—small, anonymous, entering the lion’s den armed only with a cell phone and a raw egg—doing what he felt was righteous. Making a statement against xenophobia. Taking an ass kicking because he felt it worth it.
Fuck yeah.
