If my kids are gay

Just watched the above advertisement. Now I would like to vomit.

To begin with, the woman in the ad is a private school teacher who has been an outspoken opponent against gays, civil rights, etc. Second, why shouldn’t second graders know that two men and two woman can be together? Factually, they can be together.

Mostly, I’m sick of this gay fear thing still running strong in this country. Too often, the anti-gay machine marches on with this whole if-kids-learn-about-gays-they-might-eventually-catch-The-Gay argument. It’s dumb, flawed, annoying. But mostly, it’s horribly moronic. I’m a straight 37-year-old father of two kids, and you wanna know something? If either/both are gay, I won’t be bothered one iota. Seriously, not one single iota. I will love and embrace and accept them just as I would if they were straight. See, what’s off in the dialogue here is that, in asking, “What if your kid is gay?” we’re emphasizing that something is actually wrong with being gay. And truth is, there’s nothing wrong with it. It’s who someone is, and nothing more. But we demonize … terrify … criticize—and, after enough time, people start to fear this unknown horror that is homosexuality.

Anyhow, I’m babbling. But this infuriates me, and not enough straight people speak out on the issue.

8 thoughts on “If my kids are gay”

  1. I concur, Jeff. Not enough straight people speak out on GLBT issues, not enough white people speak up on civil rights issues that primarily affect brown and black people, rich people don’t use their influence to help the poor, and on it goes.
    I have gotten more than my share of awards for writing stuff and doing stuff in my career, but I only have one award on my mantle: the one I got from the local gay community center for being an ally.
    This is our civil rights movement – maybe there are no fire hoses, but there are kids committing suicide because they’re being teased at school about being gay. I want to be on the right side of history on this one….

  2. Horrifying. Unfortunately, I believe time and patience will be the best defense against those wishing to deny gay couples their pursuit of happiness. At 36, I’m guessing we can see most every state allow gay marriage before we’re old and gray.

  3. Funny, these people aren’t lobbying against keeping kids out of churches. The things they learn there and in Bible School are far more damning than learning that *gasp* there are gay people in society.

    I just want to punch people like that square in the nose one time. It won’t do anything to help, but they sure piss me off.

  4. Jeff,

    Very well done! I have 2 teenagers and I will love them whether they are gay or not. I will also be supportive of them and their choice. That said I have question that is asked very seriously and not sarcastically. People I know look forward to the day that their children get married to a member of the opposite sex. Do we have the mindset of hoping our kids grow up gay? Specifically I am asking this of you. This question was raised at a party a few years ago that I was at by a gay person. I thought it to be a very thought provoking question. Some of the answers were interesting.

  5. Mike: My parents are about as liberal as they come and certainly considered the possibility that I and my siblings might be gay, but I will hazard a guess that they hoped we would grow up straight because they know very well how hard it is to be gay in America, especially in the South. It’s not a matter of not accepting: It’s a matter of hoping your child grows up happy, and the obstacles society puts in the way of gays and lesbians.

    That said: I don’t think they care so much about the biological grandchildren. That wouldn’t be the problem; the quality of life would.

    (Also: I’m putting words in their mouths.)

  6. I’d much rather my daughter be gay than a Republican …

    And yeah, I really truly never cared about her sexual orientation … all I cared about was that one day she will find true love, whatever that may be.

    When she was about 3 or 4 I was watching “Tales of the City” on PBS and thought she was asleep but she wasn’t … there is a love scene between two of the gay characters and she said “boys aren’t supposed to kiss boys.”

    I knew that was a teaching moment so I just said “a lot of the time girls kiss boys and boys kiss girls, but sometimes boys kiss boys and girls kiss girls. All that matters is that you love the person you’re kissing and they love you too.”

    Simplified but she was 3 or 4 … and she just said, “Oh. OK.” And that was that. And that was what she grew up knowing.

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