Headaches & Hypo

I am a hypochondriac who, every few months, finds a new reason to think he’s dying.

I’ve found a new reason.




Left side, sorta dull, but have had them every day for several weeks. The problem with being a hypochondriac with a long history is you know you’re a hypochondriac with a long history. So you become mental, either ignoring the pain because, hey, you’re a hypo or paying excessive attention to the pain because, hey, you’re a hypo. I go through the following thought process:

“It’s a tumor.”

“It’s not a tumor, you’re a hypo.”

“Just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean they’re not after you. It’s a tumor.”

“Uhg, remember the time you swore you had a tumor?”


“Well, what ever happened?”

“That was different.”


“Well, this time it’s real.”

“No, it’s not.”

“Yes, it is.”

“It’s not a tumor. It’s headaches. Lots of people have them. You’re stressed. You don’t sleep enough. You …”

“But my head hurts.”

“Well, then go see a doctor.”


“Why not?”

“Because I’m a hypochondriac.”

6 thoughts on “Headaches & Hypo”

  1. As a fellow hypochondriac with a degree in medicine from Google, here are the three things I know about tumors:

    – They’re easily treatable if you find them early.
    – You never find them early because that’s when they have no symptoms.
    – By the time you have any symptoms, it’s already too late and you’ll be dead in three days.

    Also, I’ll have developed a dull headache within minutes of reading this post.

  2. Oh man, sorry not a tumor – Brain Worms. Common with people that drink too much soda in their lifetime.
    First you have to pick up the worm, most commonly found in Rome. It feeds on the soda residue in your system, once it gets big enough it eats your brain.
    You have maybe 2 years of pain before you die.

  3. Last year I had a steady headache concentrated on the left side of my head and also thought it was a tumor. Stressed out about it for almost a week before finally going to the doctor. By this time a rash started developing on my forehead which immediately clued the doc in that I had Shingles, which really sucks, but at least isn’t a tumor.

  4. I too have hypocondria.I have diagnosed myself with so many illnesses these past two years.It’s been a colorful variety of cancers,Giant cell arteritis,diabetes ,lupus etc.I wish I knew how to rid myself of this monster.I wouldn’t wish hypochondria on my worst enemy.

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