Busted

In my status as a Z-list celebrity, right behind Mike O’Berry and Denis Mandel on the fame rankings (but clearly ahead of Roger Menache), I get recognized by face, oh, once a year. It usually takes place somewhere completely random. Once, I was sitting in the robot store at the Palisades Mall. Another time I was writing in a coffee shop. Again, it rarely happens.

However, it did happen the other day. And, man, was it humiliating …

So as I’ve discussed myriad times, authors move books. Literally. When I’m in a store, and I see my books poorly placed, I lift them up, do a little two-step shuffle and relocate them to prime real estate. That’s exactly what I was doing on Friday at the Barnes & Noble in Yonkers, N.Y. About 10 copies of Sweetness were buried way back on a table in the rear of the store. So, after locating them, I casually picked a bunch up and slowly, gracefully placed them on the NEW table up front.

It was at this moment, placing down the books, when I was approached by a dude in a Mets hat.

“Is that your book?”

Uh …

“You’re Jeff Pearlman, right?”

I was stunned. Beyond stunned. And mortified. Beyond mortified. So I did what any person in my shoes would have. “Uh, no,” I said.

“Wow,” he replied. “You look just like him.”

Glub.

4 thoughts on “Busted”

  1. Awe, Jeff. I am so disappointed in you. Whatever happened to this “accountability” & “honesty” you’re always yapping about?

  2. Jeff: NOT unusual! You are using tried & true underground marketing techniques! We do it all the time with my beer brand….we don’t have a 1/2 Billion to spend like Anheuser-Busch/In-Bev…..so we take over, one store at a time!!! We can relate! (But I would’ve admitted to being you though! Nothing to be ashamed about!) Continued good luck with sales; your book was on my Christmas list but Santa wasn’t listening….so I’m heading to Barnes & Nobel today….if you’re stuck in a lousy spot, I’ll move ’em!!!! Happy New Year!

  3. LOL! Awesome story.

    You are your best Promo team though.

    Reminds me of when the Bad Ronald album was in the $.99 rack, and I purchased them to add to the 6,000 record sale total.

    And by the way, take that video down. You are ruining my enigmatic rep:)

    Send everyone my regards!

    Happy NEw Year in Advance, I’m working on your new track!!!

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