Be Careful What You Throw Out …

So every morning, right before I feed my kids breakfast, I walk Norma the Dog around the block. As I do so, I’ve gotten into the habit of picking up neighborhood trash. Bottles, foil, plastic shards, napkis, etc. It’s not fun, but I don’t really see the downside. Street stays clean, I feel as if I’ve done something worthy, etc … etc.

Anyhow, earlier today, sitting in the street in front of a house about a mile from mine, I saw a crumpled up piece of paper, coated by writing in a thick blue marker. So I picked it up. And, ahem, read it (Names changed):

John, you do know I love you. And I do own your —-! And if a female owns her — you love to call me mistress! Today you came 2 times now your mistress must check to see if her —– has any more sperm left? You will obey me. Go to bed, strip naked, lie on your belly & your mistress will seduce you with her sex toy. Do you understand John?

I think I’ll stick to cups.