In case you missed this breathtakingly fantastic story, Kim Davis, a county clerk in Kentucky, is refusing to issue marriage licenses to gay couples on religious grounds.
When asked by a license-seeking gay man to cite whose authority she was acting under, Davis said, “God’s authority.”
Which, again, is breathtakingly fantastic.
I suppose this blog post could be about gay rights. Or Kentucky. Or Phil Simms no longer being the most famous thing to come out of Moorehead. Instead, however, I’d like to devote a moment to people who seem convinced they are acting on God’s authority.
To be blunt, you are not acting on God’s authority. Why? Because either: A. There is no God, and this is all a bunch of nonsense (the most likely scenario) or B. There is a God, and He’s got bigger fish to fry.
Let’s go with B. Right now, across the globe, there’s some crazy shit going down. ISIS is executing people. The world is heating up at staggering rates. African girls are being kidnapped and raped. Dictators are silencing people; killing people. I mean, there are 100 million awful, terrible, brutal scenarios playing out. Things that would make one’s head explode. If there is a God, and He/She is involved in the game, there’s no friggin’ way gay marriage is on the radar. I mean, c’mon. Do people like Kim Davis genuinely believe Big Guy’s watching from a cloud, thinking, “Ugh, Sal and Steve wanna wed? We must put a stop to this. Where’s Kim?” Does Kim Davis genuinely believe, of all the world’s ills, this is the one worth addressing? That’s she’s God’s personal anti-gay marriage soldier of heterosexual love?
Shit, you live in a state that’s poisoned by coal residue. Where’s Kim Davis on that one? You live in a state where gun violence is at an all-time high? Any stance on firearm licenses? You live in a state where public education is putrid. Kim?
More important, when did you, Kim Davis, become the interpreter of God’s authority? Seriously. You’re 100-percent certain He/She opposes gay marriage? Because of fleeting mentions in an ancient book etched by man via God’s supposed words? That’s your basis for this? That’s the reason you break the law and turn people away?
I would suggest Kim Davis is crazy, nuts, insane. Which, I’m quite certain, she is.
In other words, she’ll be on Fox News by night’s end. Hailed as a hero.