$11 shorts

Screen Shot 2014-05-04 at 9.41.21 PMSo I was walking through Wal-Mart the other day, waiting for the daughter to finish her acting class, when I saw the above shorts hanging from a hook of some sort. They were $11.

Sold!

Two mornings later, I was hanging outside with a bunch of neighbors, eating pancakes and playing ball and such. Someone said to me, without any anger or negativity, “You like the attention.”

I was confused. The attention of baggy basketball shorts?

“You like stirring things up,” he said.

I sighed.

I love the dialogue provided by social media, and I enjoy the voice that comes with this lightly read blog. It’s fun writing about poop and bad parkers and steroids and crazy youth sports coaches and the like. Hell, it’s beyond fun—it’s enlivening. But do I live for day to day life seeking out attention and wanting people to say, “Wow! Look at Jeff and his crazy shorts!”

No.

Truthfully, I love baggy basketball shorts. I know, at age 42, I probably look like a fool—but they’re so insanely comfortable, and my ideal writing uniform is, simply: White T-shirt, baggy shorts, flip-flops, baseball cap. That’s it, that’s all. And if it looks desperate, or pathetic, or weird; if people misinterpret the uniform as some cry for help or attention … well, I can live with that.

Years ago, I made clear one of my two life goals were: A. To never regularly attend meetings; B. To never regularly wear a collared shirt and/or shoes.

Mission accomplished.

 

1 thought on “$11 shorts”

  1. Sorry Jeff, but I’ve got to say that those are probably the ugliest shorts I’ve ever seen in my life. I’m not sure if it’s the weird 3D effect or the color combination, but i can easily understand why they were marked at $11. In fact, you may have overpaid.

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