Snake Smooch

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Some stories are awesome because they’re dazzling. Some stories are awesome because they’re breathtaking. And some stories are awesome simply because, well, they’re awesome. They exceed all expectations of the norm, and leave you breathless, shaking your head and saying, “Wow.”

Wow.

The man featured in the above photographed is named Austin Hatfield. He’s 18, lives in Wimauma, Florida  and—it seems—is not the brightest bulb in the socket. According to the Tampa Tribune, a few days ago Austin attempted to kiss a cottonmouth snake on the lips. He had captured the serpent a few days earlier, and kept it (illegally) in a pillowcase. When he puckered up, well, the snake attacked, inserting its poisonous venom in Aaron’s lips. The poor guy was hurt and hospitalized, but did not die.

I feel the need to make a few points here:

A. Don’t kiss snakes.

B. Don’t keep snakes in pillowcases.

C. This guy has the same number of votes as you and I do.

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