JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

The Jeff Pearlman.com Mock Draft

Matt Muh: Don't sleep on the intangibles of a three-letter last name.
Matt Muh: Don’t sleep on the intangibles of a three-letter last name.

Here’s my 2018 Mock Draft …

• 1. Matt Muh, quarterback. Bucknell University.

• 2. Fuck off.

Thanks for attending.

PS: Seriously—can we stop with these fucking mock drafts. All of them. Like this one. And this one. And this one. And this one. And 1,000 others. Albert Breer doesn’t know how this is about to play out. Neither does Jared Dubin. Or Dane Brugler. Or Darryl Slater. Or Joe Giglio.

Back in the day, when Dr. Z was running the show at Sports Illustrated, his mock draft was terrific. Why? Because it was informed, snarky, sharp and often right. Also, it was based as much on his opinion as “NFL sources.” And he made that clear. His copy was sharp and piercing; it had a lot of “You’d have to be an idiot to bypass X player” in it. And that made it distinctive.

But now, one mock draft is just like the other mock draft. Only, the writers don’t actually know whereof they speak. Right now, the Browns aren’t telling America who they’re going to select. The Giants and Jets aren’t, either. They’re trying to manipulate the system (and reporters) to land the best possible situation.

So stop, dammit.

Stop!