So it’s about 3 in the morning, and I just did something for the first time in my life: I bolted a motel for another motel.
I was staying at a place, the Stay Plus Extended Stay Suites, that lived up to the $66 room rate. And, really, that’s my fault. Decent motel/hotel rooms just don’t cost $66 these days. But, I dunno—the hotels.com reviews were solid. And it was just one night. And …
It.
Was.
Fucking.
Rancid.
The above photo is from my room. There are others I could have posted—the moldy sink, the hair crusted to the toilet. But I think what set me off was the bed. It was … granular. Which isn’t an adjective I’ve ever used for a bed before. Or even a chair. But it just felt as if I were sleeping atop grains of sand. Or, perhaps, little bugs. I took this photo, though it’s hard to say …
Anyhow, the final straw was the thinness of the wall, and the volume of the snorer one room over, and the fact that (oh) the front desk staff left at 9. So … as I sat there on the granular bed, with the snorer, with the mold, with the wiring … it hit me: Motherfucker, you’ve spent almost no journalism money during this pandemic year. Go splurge on the Holiday Inn 6/10 of a mile down the road!
And that’s just what I did.
