JEFF PEARLMAN

JEFF PEARLMAN

vara ray responds!

vara ray has responded to my e-mail (see here for the origin). She even attached a photo. And—I can’t believe it!—she’s an attractive young female in a bathing suit! Oh, my!

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With each passing letter I’m falling more and more for her. Here’s what she writes:

My Dearest.
How are you today? I am very happy for your respond to the mail I sent to you.My Name is Miss Vara Ray from Darfur Region of Sudan l am 23 years and presently I am residing in the refugee camp here in Dakar Senegal as a result of the death of my family by the rebels

My father were killed by rebels in our residence house in the capital city Darfur. My late father Dr. Ray Benson, was the Chairman, Gruv-Melton Oil and Gas Company a private extracting oil firm in Darfur before He was killed one early morning by the rebels as a result of the civil war that was fought in my country Sudan.

It was only me and my Mum that could make our way out of  the country .
We managed to make our way to a near by country Senegal where we live for six months and after i lost my mum due to heart attack and the hardships here in this camp here in Oakam North, 12 km from the capital city of Dakar Senegal, please don’t be discouraged for hearing this.

However i am using the computer at the office of the reverend father who is in charge of the refugee camp to write to you. I would like to know more about you.Your likes and dislikes, your hobbies and what you are doing presently, remember that you caught my attention in that site that was why I wrote to you in first place

Attached here is my picture for you,in my next mail i will also send you more of my pictures. I will also like you to send me your pictures,I hope you wouldn’t mind, Awaiting for your reply soonest.
from my heart.
Miss Vara

•••

I, of course, will respond immediately with the following:

Dear Vara, my love:

I can’t believe you have chosen me. We are now forever linked. I am so sorry about your family, and your present living conditions. But at least they let you use the office computer. That seems very nice of them. Since you ask: I am a 72-year-old Burger King employee with one arm and a dog named Frederick. We reside in a little cottage on the ocean near Kansas City, Kansas, and spend our nights together, licking vegetables and watching re-runs of “Welcome Back Kotter.” (It’s funny, vara. Most people seem to find the program dated. Frederick and I love it!!). My hobbies include ballet, cock fighting, fishing for guinea pigs and running barefoot through an ocean of donuts. When I was a boy, a rabbi named Crazy Eddie spoke to me from his television. He told me the devil lived in my Uncle’s urn. I have ever since been single, and searching for love.

But enough about me, vara. What about you? And how do you get those roses to appear below your e-mail?

Love, George